


A Penny for Your Shirts

by DoctorQui



Series: walking 'cross the campus [7]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluff, M/M, Ridiculously fluffy, Sharing Clothes, amélie is done with jesse's shit, genji continues to be a little shit, hanzo and jesse are both nerds who deserve eachother
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-23
Updated: 2017-02-23
Packaged: 2018-09-26 13:20:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9898925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoctorQui/pseuds/DoctorQui
Summary: Jesse opens an advice booth on campus. It's a smashing success, to his own surprise, and of course Hanzo gets caught up in it one way or another.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is dedicated to my dear [Lucy](http://archiveofourown.org/users/acrxphxbia). Ravenous little ferret withheld Mariachi AU from me until I posted this, so here you are. Enjoy!

Jesse McCree had many problems he wouldn’t admit to. A bad smoking habit, short attention span, hyperfixation on his beautiful boyfriend, and so on. His biggest by far, however, was his tendency to be unabashedly late for just about everything. 

 

This was how Jesse found himself sprinting across campus, murmuring apologies to several bewildered freshmen as he passed by. Although it wasn’t  _ actually _ his fault this time. He’d spent twenty minutes looking through his closet, curses dropping from his lips as he searched for one of his favorite flannels. It was to no avail, however, as it had mysteriously disappeared along with several other articles of clothing he was sure he owned. 

 

Still, a shirt wouldn’t stop him. He gripped the Stetson atop his head tightly to keep it in place and ran as fast as his legs could take him until he finally reached the quad, where Fareeha waited next to a table beneath a small white canopy. She raised an eyebrow as he slowed to a stop in front of her, huffing and puffing.

 

“You alright there, Jesse? It’s unlike you to hurry anywhere.” She smiled, crossing her arms.

 

Jesse muttered something under his breath and held up a hand, signaling for her to wait a moment. After he finally caught his breath, he managed to respond, “Aw, fuck off Fareeha. I ‘ppreciate you settin’ all this up for me but that don’t mean you get a free pass to give me shit.”

 

“I’m pretty sure you gave everyone a free pass to give you shit the moment you decided to wear a Stetson and spurs outside your room.” 

 

“Hey! You gave me this hat!” Jesse protested, crossing his arms and pouting. “And besides, it’s part of my charm. Gotta attract customers somehow, don’t I?”

 

Fareeha just shook her head. “Whatever you say, Jess. Anyway, table’s all yours. I have to go meet Angie.”

 

“Good luck! Give her my regards n’ all.” Jesse waved her off, leaning back against the table as she strode away. 

 

As soon as she was out of sight Jesse turned back to the table, eyes roaming over it. There was a big banner with the words “FREE ADVICE” printed across it in bold lettering. It was pretty cheesy, but Jesse couldn’t get enough of it--this way, he might actually be able to make a significant difference. 

 

The first few minutes after his arrival were slow, as expected. It was mid morning so most students had classes to get to at this time. Once lunchtime hit, however, things started to pick up. Jesse got a whole slew of students pouring out from the buildings, smiles lit up at the small colorful table standing out against the late winter gray. 

 

Jesse heard a wide variety of problems over the course of the afternoon. Some of them were more trivial--what classes one should take next quarter, whether or not to go to an upcoming frat party--while others got pretty deep. Occasionally someone would trust him with a really heartfelt secret, or ask about sincerely personal issues. It surprised him that people were so trusting to a stranger, but maybe that was the allure of it. At one point he had a conversation with someone about their sibling who had recently lost their legs--it hit close to home, but seeing the joy in that guy’s eyes after letting him know about his prosthetic was well worth it. 

 

The day trickled by, story after story, Jesse’s charming smile never faltering. However, there seemed to be something missing, though he couldn’t quite place it. 

 

His thoughts were interrupted by a sudden pressure over his eyes, which he immediately recognized as someone’s hands. Someone’s very  _ familiar _ hands, small but calloused, warm and slightly sweaty. 

 

“Hey there babe. You know I can tell it’s you by now, yeah?” Jesse grinned, grabbing one of the hands and dragging it down to press a kiss to Hanzo’s knuckles.

 

Hanzo huffed in response, a small smirk playing at his lips. “You could not stop me if you tried, Jesse. What is all this, anyway?” 

 

“Advice booth! Your brother had the idea. Talkin’ to me is free, though if y’need comfortin’ it’s a dollar to wear the hat and two for the serape.” 

 

“You are taking money to let others wear your clothes?” Hanzo remarked, forehead creasing. Jesse couldn’t quite place what emotion that was, but if he knew Hanzo like he thought he did, it wasn’t good. 

 

“Uh...yeah? Any extra cash helps, y’know.” Jesse shrugged. 

 

Hanzo nodded at that and walked around to the other side of the table, where he gracefully fell into the plastic chair facing Jesse. He studied his boyfriend’s face for a moment before reaching into his pocket and withdrawing...his wallet?

 

“If I pay you five dollars, will you stop?” 

 

Jesse blinked. “Huh?”

 

Hanzo rolled his eyes and repeated himself. “The hat and serape. If I pay five dollars, will you stop loaning them to strangers?” 

 

“Uh, no. Han, you can’t do that. S’not how it works, sweetheart.” He chuckled, leaning his chin into his prosthetic. 

 

“One hundred, then.”  

 

Jesse’s chuckle turned into full-blown cackling, the sound echoing through the quad. “You can’t buy me out, Hanz.”

 

Hanzo narrowed his eyes. “Two hundred.”

 

“You stop bein’ petty now, doll.” Jesse paused and pursed his lips. “You can’t mean that.”

 

“I see money won’t change your mind.” Hanzo sighed. “Fine. I have... _ other _ methods,” he said, the corners of his mouth ticking upwards in an absolutely predatory smile. 

 

Jesse felt his ears grow warm. “Uh, that--okay, fine, you win. Goddamn, you kill me darlin’,” he stuttered. He all but shoved the offending articles of clothing towards Hanzo, who took the hat and promptly placed it on his head. 

 

“Much obliged, as I believe you are inclined to say.” Hanzo grinned and tipped the hat, adding in a wink for good measure. Jesse felt his face burn hotter and shoved his head in his hands, but he couldn’t escape the sound of Hanzo’s laughter. 

\---

The advice booth ended up being a smash hit, though Jesse found himself lamenting the lack of cash. Still, helping others was fun, even if his wallet cried out against him for wasting time. He tried the booth again the following day and the one after that and was met with continued success, but was eventually dragged away by Hanzo on the weekend. There were fewer students on campus then anyway, so Jesse really didn’t mind. That, and he would never complain about spending time with his better half.

 

They were in Hanzo’s room today, lounging about on the bed. Jesse was propped up against the headboard drinking a soda while Hanzo leaned against him, thoroughly engaged in a game on his phone. It looked pretty cute--four blue and four red videogame sprites were laid out on a grid-like map, complete with trees and mountains. The blue units spouted short one-liners as Hanzo maneuvered them strategically to fight the red, each chipping damage away until one would run out of HP and disappear. 

 

He hooked his chin over Hanzo’s shoulder, watching the screen carefully. “Why is it you were excited about this again? You pulled a muscle?” 

 

Jesse felt Hanzo’s laugh vibrate against his chest. “No, Jesse, I pulled a five-star. It means I got a high-level character. This one happens to be one of my favorites in the franchise.”

 

“This’un? The little purple gal?” Jesse tilted his head, pointing towards the screen where a young girl in a flowing gown summoned a giant dragon and instantly wiped out her opponent.

 

“Julia, yes. Her backstory is very complicated, but that is part of the reason why I like her.” Hanzo smiled, moving another character over and ending his turn. 

 

Jesse hummed into Hanzo’s neck, eyes glued to the screen. He’d never played this particular series of games, despite Hanzo’s insistence, but it seemed pretty fun. Maybe he would pick it up sometime. 

 

“Well, I could see that. You’re quite the complicated guy, Han,” he murmured, kissing along the column of his boyfriend’s neck.

 

Hanzo squirmed in Jesse’s arms. “Stop that. I know what you are doing and you need to stop this instant.”

 

“Don’t know what you mean, buttercup.” Jesse laughed, continuing on unabashedly. Hanzo retaliated by wrenching himself from Jesse’s grip, causing his soda to fly out and spill across Hanzo’s shirt. They paused for a moment, both silent, before Jesse burst into giggles, doubled over on the bed. 

 

“I’m glad you find this so funny,” Hanzo growled. “Now go get me another shirt from the closet, you buffoon.” 

 

“S-Sure thing doll, my bad. Oh you shoulda seen your face, so cute.” He gave Hanzo’s cheek a quick pinch and stood up, swaggering over to the closet. Hanzo merely rolled his eyes and shucked his shirt, tossing it to the dirty laundry at the end of his bed. Jesse threw one last cheeky grin at his boyfriend before opening the closet and stopping, eyes wide. 

 

It was filled with his clothes.

 

He should’ve expected it, really, they’d been dating for long enough by this point. What truly surprised him was the scope--just how far Hanzo had gotten with his little endeavor. Jesse’s mind reeled back to weeks past, every little missing shirt and jacket, every flannel suddenly gone. 

 

“It was you!” 

 

Hanzo stood up and approached, eyebrows raised, but his eyes widened upon catching a glimpse of his own wardrobe. His cheeks quickly colored and he crossed his arms. 

 

“I assure you I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he said. 

 

“You took all my clothes! I been lookin’ for some of this shit for  _ weeks,  _ Han, it was all right here! Damn. You’re sneakier than I give you credit for,” Jesse chided, wagging a finger at his boyfriend. Hanzo merely huffed in response and grabbed a gray shirt.

 

“It is comfortable. That is all. There is no need to make a big deal out of this,” he said, shrugging it on.  

 

“Aw, hon!” Jesse reached forward and picked Hanzo up off the ground, twirling him in the air. Hanzo let out a small yelp and banged on his shoulders until he was once again safe on the ground, glaring mercilessly. 

 

Jesse’s grin could’ve split his face if it got any wider. Here was Hanzo, his proud, adorable little dragon, trying to play off his treasure horde. It was almost too much for him to handle. 

 

“Alright, well, I’ll tell you what. No charge on the clothes borrowin’, since I love to see you in my stuff anyway,” he said, delight lacing every word. “However, I will take a tax, since I need some of my own clothes to wear too. How’s about you man the advice table with me to make it up? And I won’t take no for an answer.”

 

Hanzo sighed, no doubt exasperated with Jesse’s stubbornness. “Very well. I will oblige this inane commitment you’ve created for me.”

 

Jesse opened his mouth to tease Hanzo back, but before he could the door cracked open. Amélie strode in, the picture of poise as always, but stopped quickly in front of Jesse and looked him up and down.

 

“Ah, I see your mangy mutt is here. Is he finally taking his clothes back? They’re all quite the eyesore,” she remarked, nose wrinkled in disgust.

 

“Hey now! My clothes are perfectly fine, thank you. They may not be designer brand, but ain’t nothin’ wrong with Costco. Cheap and looks fine, thank you very much,” Jesse retorted, hands on his hips. 

 

Amélie rolled her eyes. “Looks fine? Anyone with eyes could see how awful your fashion taste is. J’suis française, je le sais.” 

 

The two began to bicker back and forth on the finer details of high fashion, their argument carrying out into the hallway. Jesse turned back to Hanzo to ask for backup, but paused. His boyfriend was staring at him, eyes alight with joy. Jesse knew that look well--it was how Hanzo looked at him when he was being, in his words, an adorable idiot. Though if being an idiot meant getting Hanzo to smile like that, he’d gladly take the title. 

\---

The next Monday afternoon found Hanzo sitting with Jesse under his canopy in the quad, a light rain falling in sheets around them. Business was a bit slow due to the rain, but they’d still had quite a few customers. Genji was chief among them, having come over just to complain about Hanzo and his lamentable status as a third wheel to him and his boyfriend. Hanzo had promptly thrown him out.

 

The crowds of students were a little more harsh to Hanzo than they had been to Jesse. Almost every customer he had got back in line again after talking to him--but to see Jesse this time. 

 

“I’m just being honest. I do not understand why they are not listening.” He huffed, leaning forward on the table. “They like you quite a bit more.”

 

“Aw, don’t be so down on yourself honey. They just need to get used to you!” Jesse reassured him, rubbing a hand down his spine soothingly. “You know, the way you talk is pretty blunt. They just don’t know how to react, s’all. Give ‘em some time, I promise.”

 

“If you say so…” Hanzo grumbled, pouting. 

 

Jesse smiled and brought a hand to Hanzo’s face, turning it towards him. “You know, if you want to do something I  _ know  _ you’re good at, we could always change this lil’ thing to a kissing booth.”

 

“Oh? And you think I would let anyone else near you?” Hanzo smirked. “You are practically planning for a lawsuit, cowboy.” 

 

“Shucks, darlin’. You know just the way to make me feel wanted.” Jesse chuckled, leaning forward to give Hanzo a kiss, short and sweet.  

 

“If that is what you wish to call it, then sure,” Hanzo said. He returned Jesse’s kiss, but drew away with a sly grin. “I am keeping the clothes, though.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! This one was super self indulgent and fluffy, but I felt I had to make it up to y'all after the last one was kinda sad. Also, yes, the game Hanzo was playing was Fire Emblem Heroes, and he relates to Julia on a deep personal level because I love putting in sad references that few people understand. 
> 
> A huge thank you as always to my lovely lovely beta [Mango](http://archiveofourown.org/users/MalevolentMango)! So encouraging and adorable. Go read all her stuff, it's gold. Also, credit to her for the title!
> 
> Another thank you to the McHanzo and Shipwatch discords, y'all are great. 
> 
> And as always, find me on [twitter](twitter.com/tsoleille) or [tumblr](schrodingerslion.tumblr.com)! I love talking with people about games I love, so come scream with me about Overwatch (or Fire Emblem, if you yell with me about fire emblem I'll probably love you forever). 
> 
> Have a good one, guys!


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